Most of people is struggling to have a self-confidence including me.

This is how I raised in Japan and I believe this way have dug into my depth of my heart.

We Japanese have lots of "have-to" stuff and are obsessed to complete them all. I grow up in a mid-wealthy family and I've never had any financial problem or any consultation in school any bugs and any abuse.

Because I've kept trying to be a good kid and daughter. Pretending to be very satisfied with everything my parents gave me. 
Now I'm almost turning into 30s and still worried about my career success which will be evaluated by my parents.

I think in general Japanese parents are not good at giving compliments to their children. I hardly remember whether they gave one of them before or not.  Also, in Japan

I'm a kind of controvert person who I don't accept any compliments from others. Some people think I'm a weird person but I always have a super high expectation on myself and it's really hard to get others positive opinion smoothly and admit myself-presence. Because I'm always struggling with the thought who I am and I'm losing myself.