Homosexuality or Transgenderism?
　I'm not going to go into details because I can't and won't corroborate this story anymore, but I have glanced at a book on modern and contemporary history which says that Yukio Mishima's true love was not with the Japanese man who wrote his autobiographical novel, but with a foreigner through a certain foreign trade organization. There is a theory that Mishima's homosexuality was spread abroad through the organization rather than his works, and that "Confessions of a Mask" was not accepted as it was. I will not discuss the truth of this theory yet. Rather, I may not have the time to discuss it in my lifetime. I'll let someone else deal with Yukio Mishima, but for now, I'll leave you with only a hint of what I'm going to say about Soseki Natsume.

　The issue of homosexuality in Natsume Soseki's works is now as buried in noise as "The Moon is Beautiful. Soon there will be nothing we can do about it. So I would like to draw a clear line here first.

　In the academic and so-called "orthodox" theory of Soseki, including that of Dr. Chiaki Ishihara, "Kokoro" has been explained in terms of "homosocial", a "marginal" sociological term. If you read it dispassionately, it is true that "Kokoro" does not smell of meat. But it is a subtle thing, like the distance between "Soot and Smoke" and the criticism of "Then," and in "Light and Darkness" the smell of meat is rather strong.

　In "Light and Dark", the smell of meat is rather strong, but in "Heart", there is no smell of meat from any of the men or women. In "Kokoro," however, there is no smell of flesh from any of the men or women, and the teacher says she can't pull the roots of loneliness out of "me," that she just can't satisfy you, and there is no sign of her having sex with Shizuka. Of course, the teacher doesn't explicitly have sex with either K or me. There is no hint of it. The teacher's crotch is pressed against K's in the scene where he is about to drop K into the sea, but I can't find any other apparent physical relationship. (In order to grab her by the neck and lift her up from behind, their bodies have to be in close contact. You can't just throw your arms outstretched.) It's like "I" approaching the teacher naked, the Westerner with one monkey leg, and the teacher suddenly urinating standing up.

　However, there is a conversation in which it seems that the teacher's view of "me" points to homosexuality, and that "me" just doesn't understand the meaning of sexual preference yet.

Is love a sin?" I asked out of the blue at that moment.
"It is a sin. When I answered, "Yes, it is," the teacher's tone was just as strong as before.
Why?
You'll see why. I'm sure you already know. You've already been in love for a long time, haven't you?
　I took a moment to look inside my own heart. I looked inside my chest, but found it to be surprisingly empty. There was nothing that I could think of.
I don't have a single object in my chest that I can think of. I don't think I'm hiding anything from you.
I'm not hiding anything from you. You move because there is no object, you move because you think it will calm you down.
I'm not moving that much right now.
You moved to me as a result of your lack.
That may be true. But that's not love.
It's the first step to love. The first step in embracing the opposite sex is to come to me, the same sex.
"It seems to me that the two are completely different in nature.
"No, they are the same. I am a man who cannot give you the satisfaction you deserve. I am a man who just can't give you satisfaction, and then there are certain special circumstances that make it even more difficult for me to give you satisfaction. I actually feel sorry for you. It is inevitable that you will move away from me. I'd rather have that. But ......"
　I felt strangely sad.
I can't help it if you think I'm moving away from you, but I haven't had the urge to do so yet.
　The doctor did not listen to my words.
But you have to be careful. Love is a sin. In my place there is no satisfaction, but there is also no danger... Do you know what it feels like to be tied up by long black hair?
　Hundreds and thousands of people have taken various "meanings" out of this same quote. The reason for the various interpretations is that it is the "standard order of embracing love". The reason for the various interpretations is that there are different judgments as to whether the teacher's words, "It's a regular step of going up to love, and as the order of embracing the opposite sex, he first came to me, a person of the same sex. No matter whether it is a general statement or an experience, from the current viewpoint where discrimination against homosexuals is severely condemned, I think it is such an extreme view.

　Inagaki Ashiho would probably argue against this view.

It's like heterosexuality is the real thing and homosexuality is a rite of passage. You should watch "Bohemian Rhapsody". The sentient path is the real thing, the V-sense is a fake, the A-sense is the right one. ...... Oh, you noticed that in "Mein Kampf," the man and the man are properly united in Buddhahood.　
　Yes, all homosexuals would probably argue with his logic. Yes, all homosexuals would argue against his logic, saying that their homosexuality is not a rite of passage. If you read him calmly, he seems to be saying that there is no such thing as an essential homosexual here. It is as if he is saying to "me" that you are a temporary homosexual and will soon become a normal heterosexual and leave me. If this theory is wrong and nonsense from a homosexual's point of view, it would at least mean that it is a simple mistake to assume that the current teacher is a homosexual, based on his statement. Yes, this is one line of thought.

　Where this strange theory came from may not be a very important question. For example, if you read Mori Ogai's "Ita Sex Alice," it may be enough.

　There are dormitories in schools. After class, I dropped by to check it out. This is where I first heard about male sexuality. A boy named Kage-koji, who was in my class and rode to school every day, was the object of their unrequited love. Kagekoji was not very good at his work. He was a pitiful boy with puffy red cheeks. It was also new knowledge to me that the word "boy" was used in the sense of the passive of male sexuality. The man who had told me to stop by on my way home had also thought of me as a boy. The man who told me to stop by on my way home also thought I was a boy, until I stopped by a couple of times to offer him a treat and talk about kindness. At that time, he made me eat things such as beans, which were called "kompeito" by the calligrapher, and baked potatoes, which were called "yokan" by the calligrapher. However, the kindness seemed to be a little sticky from the beginning, and I didn't like it, but I didn't want to be disrespectful to my elders, so I tolerated it. Eventually, she held his hand. He would rub his cheeks. It was too noisy for me. I don't have what it takes to be an Urning. I was sick of stopping by on my way home, but the inertia of my previous relationships compelled me to do so. One day I came by and saw that the floor had been removed. The man was acting even more annoying than usual. The blood was on his head and his face was red. Finally, he said to me, "Hey, I'm just going to take a look at this.
I don't want to.
I don't want to.
I don't want to." "Don't say that. Come on."
　He takes my hand. The hotter he gets, the more disgusted and afraid I become.
I don't want to. I'm leaving.
　While we're talking about this, a man calls out from the next room.
"No?"
"No."
"Then I'll back you up.
　I run out of the next room into the hallway. I open the sliding door of the room I was in and jump in. This man was a violent man and I did not associate with him from the beginning. This man was at least as good as he seemed, and the man who caught me was a hypocrite.
The man who caught me was a hypocrite. "If you don't listen to the elders, I'll have you steamed and chastised.
　His hand moved with the words. He pulled the covers over my head. I tried my best to bounce back. He pushed me from above. A few calligraphers came to take a peek. A few calligraphers came to take a peek. My hand slackened as I pushed from above. I jumped up and ran away. I thought I had been quick enough to snatch a book package and an ink pot at that moment. I did not go to the boarding house again. ("Ita Sex Alice" by Mori Ogai)
　In the same way as in prisons and dormitories, it is also hard to deny that there is such a thing as male sexuality as a substitute for the opposite sex. A warlord's surname is also a substitute. Is it safe to assume that there are such things, and that the teacher regarded them as the essence of homosexuality? Rather, the question is whether or not "I" am what he regarded me to be, and if he is not a homosexual, what is he?

　As I have repeatedly written, "I" approach the teacher out of nostalgia, and since this intuition is substantiated by the teacher's suicide note, it is implied that "I" am a reincarnation of K. Therefore, it may be said that she did not approach him out of "homosexuality," but it is true that she seems to have approached him naked in Kamakura, and the description of the bathing in the sea cannot be understood in such a distant sociological term as "homosocial. In contrast to the homophobia in "Kita Sex Alice," the bathing scene is clearly homosexual. In order to solve this twist, we need to clarify the true nature of the teacher.

It seems to me that the two things are completely different in nature.
"No, they are the same."
　Focusing on this part alone, it sounds like a statement by a transgender person, but what he is saying is that you are not approaching me out of nostalgia, but out of sexual desire, and that both homosexuality and heterosexuality are caused by loneliness. I think this is a unique theory.

　I think it is safe to say that the unique nature of his love can be summed up in the platonic love that appears in his suicide note. Yes, this is the second line.

　Please remember. This is how I have lived my life. When I first met you in Kamakura, or when I went for a walk with you in the suburbs, my mood was much the same. There was always a black shadow trailing behind me. It was as if I was dragging my life through the world for my wife. The same thing happened to you when you graduated and went back to your country. (Kokoro, Soseki Natsume)
　I think this is the end of the story. The teacher was actually possessed by a black shadow, while "I moved my muscles full of freedom and joy and went crazy in the sea. He didn't even realize that the "I" who approached him out of nostalgia was the reincarnation of K. That's why the teacher misunderstood that "I" was approaching him out of homosexuality. In the relationship between huli and fall, "It's a standard way to go up to love. It's the first step in embracing the opposite sex, but she came to me, the same sex.

Translated with www.DeepL.com/Translator (free version)